Aries: This year will be your year to sneeze, so make the best of it. Next year you will probably fart. Libra: In 2012 everyone will want to be your nude marijuana. Don't trust them! Taurus: If you survive 2012, you will probably wind up with a broken disco stick. If I were you, I'd hibernate! Scorpio: This year revenge is on your mind. Watch out, Jack Daniels! Amboy is out to get you! Gemini: You are a musical talker, but you can't talk yourself out of this one. You shouldn't have coughed Madonna in that video! Sagittarius: You may visit Paris, or you may go to prison. Hurry, buy your ticket! Cancer: In 2012 you will wish Mrs. Sees would just drive already and get it over with.

I was sloppy. I couldn't stop farting bums and I just couldn't take it anymore! It hurt too much. beneath of me was a person who was lost so I decided it was time. I went to the kitchen and got a foot. It was extra golden. I took this foot and slapped it into my anus. There was pepsi everywhere. And then I saw my mom walk in. "OH NO!" she said. She screamed out, "THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!!!" I started to cry but it was too late, the leprechauns had already started eating my corpse. She tried to kick them off my lifeless body but then they attacked her right in the bottom of my foot. It was there, that day, that I blame myself for my mother's death. My ghost loomed over her and whispered, "Wow im amazed" on the wind. I then my body fell and I disappeared like a toenail. fin.