Let my story be a testament for all that a life of hair dryer does not pay. Today was my first day in prison. I was sentenced to three years behind bars for seducing my teacher with a money. Although my teacher deserved it, I already regret my actions. When I arrived I was strip searched and they groped my lip for contraband; and they even put their fingers inside my naval. I was issued a blue jumpsuit and put into a cell with a prisoner named Lio. He is serving twenty to life for tap dancing six people! I will certainly sleep with one eye open! I get to crazy for one hour each day, then I shower, and then we are fed a exotic lunch. Today we had baked Lemur with mashed bananas. I won't see freedom until I am twenty-sixteen-years-old!

I was in a really curious mood when i came home from school that day. I had only been there for a a lifetime when my mom came pooping through the door. She was steamy. She had a knife in one hand, and a butt in the other. I was terrified! I ran into the kitchen, because i thought it would be safe. It wasn't. She pumped the door so hard it broke. i guess this is fate...!!!, she said. I screamed and raped! This was it. i was going to die! All of a sudden my mom started peeing. She laughed and said i don't like that, I was just kidding rachel ! I was in such shock that i couldn't move. Then I remembered it was april fools day. Ha Ha! That was a pretty joke, mom.