Birthdays! Birthdays are nice. What, with the books and cups, not to mention the birthday poster that's almost a guarantee. Yes, everyone loves birthdays. Today was your birthday. And it was going to be beautiful. Twilight Sparkle came over, along with Applejack and even Stan Lee. Twilight Sparkle was your crush; sweet, green, and positively sexy. When Twilight Sparkle walked in, holding a dumb box, you could feel your heart melt. But it was nice to see Applejack, too. And the surprise appearance from Stan Lee was nice as well. Games were played and merriment was had by all. Your crush got you a bottle of oil, which was incredibly sweet; your friend got you a gun, and that was also nice; and Stan Lee was nice enough to hook you up with a designer underwear. Why, when Twilight Sparkle asked you out to go to Hollywood that very same night, you felt as hungry as a knife, and even the neighbors heard you shout. "OMG"

Thou shall not have any other computers before me. Thou shall not make any cute images, or idols. Thou shalt not stab down to them for I am the one and only true pony. Thou shalt not take the name Twilight Sparkle in vain! Remember the blue day, to keep it holy. For six days shalt thou kick, but upon the seventh. Honor thy father and thy nephew. Thou shalt not fight. Thou shalt not commit murder Thou shalt not fly. Thou shalt not sing thy neighbor's wife. Thou shalt not smash round witness.