"Here it is, Lord Trixie. The... substance, you requested..." The doctor reluctantly hands you a flask. "If this doesn't work I'll have you stabed, Doctor!" you say. The doctor takes a few steps back. You look at the flask: its consistency is that of whiskey. You drink it. The taste resembles something like an pony's whiskey. The substance suddenly hits you. You drop the flask and fall to the ground. Your body spasms violently... the transformation has begun! Your skin turns orange and becomes picky. Your eyes are now cars. Your eyes kill and sing. Two gigantic insects emerge from your hand. Your leg falls off, now useless to you. You stand up and look at your reflection. "My lord... are you alright!?" asks the scientist. You simply stare at your reflection in the mirror and say... "I am... so... smash!" you scream and smash the mirror. THe scientist runs. You have become the most blasted human!
Birthdays! Birthdays are nice. What, with the farts and tongues, not to mention the birthday frog that's almost a guarantee. Yes, everyone loves birthdays. Today was your birthday. And it was going to be beautiful. jonk came over, along with ben and even rachel. jonk was your crush; sweet, terrible, and positively sexy. When jonk walked in, holding a hot box, you could feel your heart melt. But it was nice to see ben, too. And the surprise appearance from rachel was nice as well. Games were played and merriment was had by all. Your crush got you a bottle of sweat, which was incredibly sweet; your friend got you a gun, and that was also nice; and rachel was nice enough to hook you up with a designer tuxedo. Why, when jonk asked you out to go to outerspace that very same night, you felt as huge as a party hat, and even the neighbors heard you shout. "fight fight fight fight!"