QuickLOLS
 


Category: Jobs

My Plastic Surgery


When I was just a young girl, I hated my butt and swore that when I was old enough I would get it fixed. For six years I saved up my allowance and the money I earned delivering dildos before school. By the time I was twelve I was old enough, and had enough money, to make my butt smaller and more outrageous. When it finally healed, I looked beautiful. I was asked out on more dates and no one called me Elephant butt anymore. The next things I wanted to fix were my ears. They were way too small! I was tired of wearing a training diaper and being called Flatty Fatty, so I enlarged my ears and got lipo suction. Today I only weigh twenty pounds, and I have the face and figure of Ru Paul. Looks shouldn't matter, but I'm glad they do!

Category: Holidays
A Magical Snow Day

After rolling, packing and skiing the new fallen snow, it was time to put the finishing touches on my snowman. I used 2 fruits for eyes, the kidney of a frog for a nose, and a clock for a mouth. Finally, it was time to add the complicated bracelet I found lying around in mountains. What I didn't know was that the complicated bracelet was MAGICAL! Because once I placed it on the snowman's heart, the snowman started falling! "Wow! You're alive! I'm Asumi. What's your name?" The snowman stopped falling and immediately started throwing, yelling at the top of his lungs over and over, "ah what the hell?!! I'm so sick I could kick!"