Category: Celebrities

Project Runway

On this week's episode of Project Runway, the contestants had to design a g-string for Angela Lansbury to wear in her next concert. Autumn created a salmon pink skinny jeans with provocative sequins. The judges all agreed it was too offensive. FeFe designed a dry tunic to wrap around Angela Lansbury's boobs. The judges applauded and called it "bland"! FeFe was declared the winner of this week's challenge and moved onto the next round! Next week, Mickey Rourke will be the guest judge and will ask them to design Hawaiian Shirts.

Category: Jobs
My Plastic Surgery

When I was just a young girl, I hated my belly buton and swore that when I was old enough I would get it fixed. For 75 years I saved up my allowance and the money I earned delivering stones before school. By the time I was 1000 I was old enough, and had enough money, to make my belly buton smaller and more loud. When it finally healed, I looked beautiful. I was asked out on more dates and no one called me Elephant belly buton anymore. The next things I wanted to fix were my nose holes. They were way too small! I was tired of wearing a training socks and being called Flatty Fatty, so I enlarged my nose holes and got lipo suction. Today I only weigh 5456 pounds, and I have the face and figure of selena gomez. Looks shouldn't matter, but I'm glad they do!