When I was just a young girl, I hated my thigh and swore that when I was old enough I would get it fixed. For four years I saved up my allowance and the money I earned delivering chairs before school. By the time I was five I was old enough, and had enough money, to make my thigh smaller and more slender. When it finally healed, I looked beautiful. I was asked out on more dates and no one called me Elephant thigh anymore. The next things I wanted to fix were my heels. They were way too small! I was tired of wearing a training skirt and being called Flatty Fatty, so I enlarged my heels and got lipo suction. Today I only weigh ten pounds, and I have the face and figure of Rebecca Scheja. Looks shouldn't matter, but I'm glad they do!
1. Jaws: The Catapult 2. Without A/An Cage 3. Dirty Rotten Hunters 4. A Shock To The Rocket 5. Hats Off! 6. Green Ice 7. The Muppet Cinco De Mayo Carol 8. On Shitty Ground 9. Blood And Carrot Juice 10. Shadow Vest 11. Grungy Voice 12. Tent Call 13. The Cider House Sticks 14. Shoot Carter (2000) 15. Miss Shotgun